#WednesdayWisdom - Building lasting professional relationships with Debbie Gardiner MBE
Debbie Gardiner MBE
I genuinely like people and have a desire to see them reach their full potential and fulfilment in their lives. No, I’m not a soft and fluffy person, I’m actually highly driven and focussed on business success, which I believe can only be achieved through hiring and developing the right people and bringing them along on the journey.
Family is especially important to me, I’ve been married to Barrie for 43 years, we have two grown up children Donna and Dan, three grandsons Rob, Matt and Ben and a great grandson Louie-Jay. I’m a firm believer that a building block of truly effective professional relationships comes from getting to know people and taking an interest in what’s important to them away from the ‘day job.’
Career Path
I left school at 16 with an average set of GCSEs and CSEs and started working in an office, I had a few office and retail jobs before embarking on a career path in training and development. I wasn’t lucky enough to be offered a formal Apprenticeship but so much of what I’ve learnt was on-the-job, plus I completed a CIPD level Operational Management NVQ, it’s been very much like an Apprenticeship journey. You won’t be surprised to hear me say that I’m passionate about Apprenticeships.
I delivered practical/vocational skills training in food retail, soft skills and management training, I trained 1000s of Assessors and 100s of Internal Verifiers (now IQAs), I’ve held leadership and management roles, including the MD, CEO and Executive Chairperson for a training provider.
In 2018 I set up DSG L&M Consultancy Services and have been self-employed since. I have several Non-Executive Director and Governance Advisor roles. Professional business relationships are a key success factor for me.
I’d say to all young people that they shouldn’t allow an early bumpy ride to determine their future.
When I met His Royal Highness the Prince of Wales, Prince Charles
I know people always say things like they’re ‘humbled’ and ‘honoured’, but I can honestly say that I am. When I found out in November 2017 that I was going to be awarded an MBE for Services to Apprenticeships and Charity I was so excited and proud; it’s the biggest secret I’ve ever had to keep from my family and colleagues. My investiture took place in March 2018, it was a day that I’ll never forget, I met so many amazing recipients of MBEs on the day, we shared stories and experiences, it did leave me feeling humbled and asking, ‘why am I here?’ because some of these people blew me away with what they’d achieved.
Prince Charles showed a keen interest in Apprenticeships, he asked relevant questions and cam across as genuine ambassador for Apprenticeships. The one thing that made me sad was that my parents didn’t live to see it.
I now feel a degree of pressure to live up to the honour of receiving an MBE and live my professional and personal life in way that is fitting for a Member of British Empire. In the summer of 2020 during the pandemic, I was due to have a birthday celebration/fundraiser in aid of Cancer Research UK, but like so many others it had to be postponed, so I decided to do a head shave to raise much needed funds for CRUK instead.
What is about people?
Before I talk about business relationships, I want to pose a question for you all to consider – what is about people?...
One definition I found that I think perfectly describes it is “human beings making up a group or assembly or linked by a common interest.” People | Definition of People by Merriam-Webster (merriam-webster.com)
Let’s not get all philosophical about it, let’s keep it simple. It takes more than one person to build, develop and manage professional relationships, it takes a common interest or goal, it takes belief in the power of connecting people and it takes respect.
Networking or relationship building
I’m not a fan of the traditional networking events, I’m sure they have their place and work for some, but for me I don’t like the idea of being there for the purpose of meeting people and building my network, I prefer to build my network by meeting people naturally through the way I do business. I can count on one hand the long-standing professional relationships I have that started through traditional networking, whereas I’ve lost count of the number of long lasting meaningful professional relationships I have, that started off in a business meeting or an introduction from a trusted professional.
I’m not saying don’t attend networking events, I’m saying think about what works best for you and how you prefer to meet people. Keep your mind open to potential business contacts that could become part of your wider network of professionals; other delegates on a course that you’re on, someone providing you with a service, ex-colleagues, a customer/client, a neighbour etc. Opportunities arise at unexpected times; I find that people very often keep their professional and personal lives so separated that their family and friends don’t really know what they do, a chat about work life could result in amazing introductions.
What is your secret to long lasting relationships?
The foundation of a long lasting effective professional relationship is based on mutual trust and respect. It’s important to understand what both parties want and need from the relationship and to recognise that the relationship will mature and change over time. You must give time and effort to the relationship and always do what you say you’re going to do.
Don’t build your network simply around what you need today, build your network to be future proof, in the understanding that you might be able to help them more than they help you but that might change. I’ve already talked about the importance of really getting know the people and understanding what’s important to them at and away from work.
Respect diversity, the different knowledge and skills people have and embrace their different approaches. As an MD and CEO and now as a self-employed NED/Consultant having a trusted sounding board is vital; by adopting an approach of support, challenge and honest feedback it can add significant value and be a powerful tool.
Good introductions
I’ve always prided myself on being able to make good introductions and connecting the right people and I see this skill amongst my network of trusted professionals too. Of course, being able to make recommendations and referring potential work is a tangible output of professional business relationships and an important one too.
My final point is to remember how important ‘active listening’ is and when things are tough, be there to listen and support, help them to generate ideas and practical solutions, and to recognise the positives and potential opportunities.
My top 5 tips for Apprentices in how to set their professional relations up for success
Try out different ways to find the right people to build professional relationships – different approaches work for different people
Know what you want to get from the relationship today and in the future
Pick like-minded people that share your values
Listen; you must have a genuine interest in the person
Work hard to build and then maintain what will become a long-term trusted relationship
